The success of love is in the loving – it is not in the result of loving. Of course it is natural in love to want the best for the other person, but whether it turns out that way or not does not determine the value of what we have done. Mother Teresa

What do you usually pray about?

I think I frequently get prayer backwards.

When I first began my attempt to follow Jesus, I found fascination in the public prayers of more seasoned Christians. They prayed about every event in life, every choice and decision. They prayed for safety and health, for pregnancy, and for nearly any imaginable result.

Christian athletes prayed for success, Christian soldiers prayed for victory, and Christian business folks prayed for increased profits. No matter the arena or desired outcome, it seemed that someone prayed about it.

Curiously, there were always profuse thanks from the winners, the success stories, the prosperous, those who realized their dreams. You didn’t hear much from those on the other side of the ledger.

This common model for conversation with God envisions Him as a cosmic vending machine. You choose the preferred product, put in the right payment, turn the handle, and expect Him to produce the right result. And when God meets your expectations, you say thanks.

And if things don’t go your way, then perhaps God is saying, “No” or “Not now.” Perhaps He’s preparing you for a future challenge, or maybe you didn’t pay the right price. Maybe you just don’t have enough faith.

Frankly, the whole thing seemed a bit pointless to me, since He already knows my wants and needs anyway. It felt a little superficial, like I was reading the lines of a script because I was expected to read them. Prayer seemed like an exercise, a sort of false piety intended mostly to say the right words and ultimately get what we want from God.

I think this vending machine model misses the entire point.

I do believe God cares about every event in our lives. I think Jesus grieved when I fell and endured the struggle of paralysis. He weeps at the death of a child, and hates to see us disappointed, sad, or hurt. He does not minimize or dismiss our desires, needs and concerns, but they are clearly not the main point to Him.

Jesus spent most of His time telling us, in Steven Covey’s words, that “…we are not human beings on a spiritual journey, we are spiritual beings on a human journey.”

“Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. … For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” [Luke 12:27-31,34]

So how does this relate to prayer?

I think the focus of prayer shouldn’t be asking for results and thanking God when we approve of outcomes. We’d do better if we sought help in doing things His way.

• I think He cares what we do; I think He cares much more about how we do it.
• I think He cares about results, but they’re always temporary; I think He cares more about character, which is permanent.
• I think He cares about the path we’re traveling; I think He cares more about the direction we’re heading.
• I think He values me because of my identity as His child, because of who I am in Christ, and not because of what I accomplish.

When things don’t go my way, or when they do, I’d do better to stop seeking a rational, human-created explanation. Sometimes there’s an answer to Why, but mostly the logic is shrouded in the mystery of eternity. Rather than demanding cause-and-effect clarification, I’d do better to ask Him how I ought to respond.

That’s really the central premise of SetFreeToday. Where you’ve been matters less to God than where you’re going. He offers the chance to choose a new direction, a new beginning, each day.

“Thy will be done” isn’t a request for favorable circumstances. It’s a longing to understand how God wants me to respond, the direction He wants me to travel, the kind of person He wants me to become. I need to stop talking, asking, and demanding.

I need to listen and follow.

What’s your take on prayer?

Being a Christian is more than just an instantaneous conversion – it is a daily process whereby you grow to be more and more like Christ. Billy Graham

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Happy Saturday! If you’re new to THE CRAZY QUEST, you may wish to read about it here. Basically, I’m tracing my journey as I attempt to answer the question: What would you do if you didn’t know you couldn’t do it?

This week of training: 108 miles (and some vacation/R&R)

SURVIVE OR THRIVE

When I began riding my hand cycle, it was all about survival.

I didn’t try to ride well, or ride fast, or even ride better. I simply tried to get to the end of the ride. It didn’t really occur to me that it might be any different. I was, after all, a quadriplegic. I was weak, I couldn’t use most of my body, and survival was about all I could expect. If I got where I was going, the ride was a success.

I think a lot of people live their lives like that. They’re just trying to get wherever they’re going, and as long as they’re reasonably upright they’re satisfied.

It took me a long time to learn that cycling, and life, didn’t have to be about survival. After a lot of years and miles of just crawling along, maintaining a minimal pace but not really trying for anything more, I magically discovered that riding could be about more than minimal survival.

SURVIVE TO STRIVE

I discovered that I could work on technique, get stronger, and push myself even when it hurt. And it did hurt, but each time I pushed past the pain I realized that it didn’t kill me. I learned that I could work, I could try, and it actually felt kind of good.

I moved from surviving to striving.

I didn’t instantly ride much faster. Massive shoulders didn’t magically materialize. In fact, at first there really wasn’t much observable change in my performance, but it still felt good. And that taught me something important.

Striving involves its own intrinsic value. Even when progress proved ponderously slow, it still felt good to do something besides simply surviving. I think it’s part of the Substance Or Style discussion, the idea that the value lies more in process than in results. As soon as you focus on results, you get disappointed because it never happens fast enough.

I think striving is an important part of a substantial life. It’s okay to progress slowly, or even to fail. But to live a life of substance, you have to try. It’s got to be about more than simple survival.

SURVIVE TO STRIVE TO THRIVE

In the past year I’ve increased my normal riding speed more than 20%. I’m still painfully slow by regular cycling norms, but the improvement feels like thriving to me. I used to struggle to survive a ten-mile ride. This summer I’m riding 25-30 miles per day 5-6 times each week.

The point that seems important is the progression, from survive to strive to thrive. The middle step is the critical one, and in cycling and life we tend to want to skip it. But the middle step is the process, and you can’t skip it.

SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS

First, you gotta survive, take the initial blow, and get back on your feet—or, in my case, get your backside in a wheelchair. It’s painful and difficult, and it takes time. Most of us understand that part.

But then the culture messes us up, because the messages jump to results. Shake it off. Get back in the game. Just do it. Quit surviving and thrive—right now!

New diet? The weight will disappear in a few days. Beginning a workout program? You’ll have a cover-model body quickly in twenty easy minutes per day. Finances a mess? Call for our simple five-step plan to wealth, risk-free.

We want to skip the striving, the struggle, pain, and risk. We want it all, and we want it now. That’s the way it happens for everyone else, right?

I think that’s a big problem with how I pray. I ask God for the results, like He’s some cosmic gumball machine—stick in the right words, pull the handle, and out pops my wish. Except that’s not how it works.

God cares more about my character than my accomplishments, and character’s about the striving. Perhaps if I prayed for persistence and patience I’d feel a bit less like a kid sitting on Santa’s lap.

My cycling is thriving right now. It’s better than I ever imagined, and maybe I’ll write a book—TWO YEARS TO INSTANT SUCCESS!

My life’s thriving as well. Only took twenty years to figure out that I can do more than survive the ride. Finally, I learned that I can get past the pain and fear, that failure doesn’t kill me (I’m not skydiving), and that it feels good to work on stuff I enjoy, to help others, and to define success in my own terms.

I hope you’re thriving—but I hope even more that you’re striving.

What’s an area where you can shift from surviving to striving?

Did you enjoy this article? Please leave a comment, visit my website, and/or send me an email at rich@richdixon.net. 

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